When I first found out I was pregnant I was sure that I was going to opt for a cesarean because of my vaginismus. It seemed like the correct choice and I was terrified to put my vagina through the trauma of giving birth. However, one of the doctors told me that she believed all women have a right to deliver vaginally and to not just jump to having a Cesarean, even those of us diagnosed with vaginismus. She recommended that I get an early epidural. After a few weeks of researching cesareans and epidurals, I decided that an early epidural and a vaginal delivery was the choice for my body.
I ended up delivering my little one vaginally and now I feel like my very own vaginismus super hero. However, now that I have given birth, I know I couldn’t have done it without my very own vaginismus sidekick - the Essential Early Epidural. Ladies, let me just say that if you have vaginismus and you are planning to deliver vaginally, I cannot express enough the amount of gratitude my mind and body felt by opting for an early epidural. Since I was eleven days late, I have vaginismus, and I was getting an early epidural, the doctors didn’t check to see how far dilated I was until AFTER the epidural was administrated. At the birthing center at my hospital they check to see how far along in labor you are when you are first admitted. Personally, I wouldn’t have been able to get through the doctor checking my cervix without an epidural. After the lower half of my body went numb, the doctor wanted to see how far dilated I was. I remember looking down and saw most of his arm disappear and I didn’t feel any pain. I felt a little bit of pressure, but it wasn’t anything that I felt I needed to mention. I can barely handle a Q-Tip penetrating my vagina, let alone an entire hand! I was very nervous to get an epidural. They stick a giant needle into your back and they wouldn’t let me hold my husband’s or my mom’s hand while they were putting it in. I had to be perfectly still. But honestly, getting the IV put in for me at the beginning was so much worse. The first nurse who tried didn’t place it properly and it was very uncomfortable and painful. The second nurse who stepped in to place the IV did so wonderfully that I hardly noticed it the entire time it was in. While waiting for the anesthesiologist, the contractions I were having because extremely intense and painful. The nurse was having a hard time keeping track of the baby's heart-rate because I couldn’t lay still while having my contractions. She suggested that I have some pain medication to help calm down since I wasn't handling labor very well at this point. The pain medication felt as if I had taken 10 days’ worth of Benadryl at one time. I felt out of it, but was still awake. I threw up once before anesthesiologist came into the room and once right before he started to administer the epidural. Since I was on pain medication I hardly felt the epidural needle going into my body. I remember feeling a little bit of pressure on my back and then I started to not be able to move my legs. After a little bit, I couldn’t feel anything past my belly button. I will admit that when I could no longer feel anything below my belly button, I tried to move my legs and I became very panicky. I knew I wasn't supposed to be able to move them, but for those first 10 minutes I freaked out. After the initial 10 minute-cannot move-cannot escape feeling passed, I was fine and very thankful that I couldn't feel anything below my belly button. With the pain medication and the epidural, I felt like I could push for hours. However, I only needed to push for 2.5 until my baby was ready to come out. I'm very happy that I got an epidural and would do so again if my husband and I decide to have another child. I'm not ashamed that I opted for the early epidural. On the contrary, I'm very thankful that I had it done. It just made everything so much smoother and helped to keep my stress levels down. It is possible to give birth naturally while having vaginismus, it just wasn't the most beneficial option for me and I'm okay with that. -Key
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About Key:Mid-twenties, first time mom, loving wife, vaginismus patient, hamster parent. Archives
February 2018
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